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1/15/05 Ew, winter's back: More than two solid weeks of spring-like temperatures, and dammit, now I've got the heat on again. Richmond's temps went down over thirty degrees in one day. Bummer. You win some, you lose some: The climbing gym has a regular Saturday night thing called Kids Klimb Time (don't blame me, I didn't name it), which is essentially babysitting with rock climbing thrown in. From six to nine on Saturdays, you can drop off your kid for three hours of climbing, with pizza supplied. Since I've been working there, the weekend managers discovered that I'm pretty good with the little buggers, so I get the job more often than not. Tonight, one of my regulars showed up. I've discovered that if she feels I'm not paying enough attention to her, she goes off and cries. (Life is so hard when you're seven.) Tonight, all she did was sulk for the last twenty minutes. But one of the other children, Matthew, upon learning that his mother would be bringing him back tomorrow so she can take the test and belay him herself, told her that he'd rather have me. He's nearly six. She tried to explain that if she passed the test, he wouldn't need me to climb. He still wanted me. Okay, all together now: Awwwww. No, I'm not kidding: I met a woman last week who does voiceovers. She told me she's the backup Aflac duck. How'd you like to have that on your resume? When she's not doing voiceovers, she's teaching healthcare seminars. In the middle of the one on how to fill out insurance forms, I heard, "Aflac! Aflac! Aflac!" It's a strange world. Last chance: Sunday is the last day for nominations in Israelly Cool's Jewish and Israeli Blogger awards. I've already been nominated, but if you want to nominate some others, go over there before you forget. permalink | | 1/14/05 The pod people are taking over the world Now the EU is acting in a manner we've never seen before. They're actually blaming the palestinians for terror, and telling Abbas to do something about it.
But what about the moral equivalency quotient? Where's their call for Israeli restraint?
Oh. Phew. For a minute there, I was beginning to think I'd woken up on a different planet. permalink | | Will the real Colin Powell please stand up? This is what he said to Larry King yesterday:
Someone check in his cellar for pods. permalink | | 1/13/05 Cause and effect: The Independent has another
howler, discussing Italy's La Stampa dropping the Okay, so who do we believe? Now Herb Keinon says Sharon will not put aside his demands that Abbas stop terrorism.
I'm so confused. And in news of the Yeah, Right: Abbas says he's ready to meet security commitments. We won't hold our breath. Boom, there it goes! The IAF blew up a car in Gaza. Unfortunately, no terrorists died in the explosion. However, neither did any Israeli civilians, for whom the bomb-laden car was meant. permalink | | 1/12/05 Can the Yourish Catcam be far behind? Because Rahel demanded itokay, no she didn't, but you know she wants itI took a few movies of the cats today with the digicam. The first one is titled Gracie, Come Here (344k, mpeg). She's a cat. Guess what happens. The second one is, No, Tig, Stay There For A Minute. No. Wait. WAIT! (184k, mpeg) As you can see, my cats always do exactly as they're told. Which one's the ass, and which is the ogre? You have to click on this link to answer the question. Attention, fellow AMC watchers: I know who the shooter is! So there I am, watching AMC today, and suddenly, it hits me! The identity of the shooter! I'm right, I know I'm right, the pieces all fit. And so I quickly run over to a few of the AMC forums I found on Google, and was all set to divulge my theory, when I see on the spoilers section: The identity of the shooter. Yes, it's who I thought it was. But damn. I thought I was the first. Do I have to watch all the same shows Treacher watches? Please tell me I can watch shows he doesn't. He doesn't watch Gilmore Girls, right? Right? And speaking of shows Treacher watches, y'know, tonight's episode of Lost made me go, "Ew. EW!" (And not about Hurley's hurling, either.) permalink | | Regular readers know I've been temping lately. One of my temp jobs is helping out at various seminars in the Richmond area. I had no idea how rich and varied the seminar field is. In the past few months, I've worked quite a few different seminars, ranging from software training to property law to childcare towell, let me tell you about it. This morning's workshop was titled "Self-Mutilation." It was about adolescents who cut themselves. I'd heard of the problem before, and so didn't really raise an eyebrow at the subject matter. However, registration this morning was a bit unusual. The problem involved signing in. Over a hundred people approached the registration tables, wanting to be sure they were at the right conference (we did not have a giant sign, only literature on the tables). But they were also hesitant to ask at the wrong table, which is understandable. Picture this conversation:
So here we are, two temps sitting at the registration table, and people walking up afraid to ask if they're in the right place. Sometimes, they would see the program on the table, their faces would light up, and they'd say, "Oh, this is the right place!" After a while, I could see them trying to figure out what to do, so I'd start:
The hotel employee whose job it was to change the notice boards with the day's workshops came up to the table and asked for the name of the conference. He was clearly intensely uncomfortable talking about the subject at all. So we had a short conversation:
He went off, clearly relieved he didn't have to have "Self-Mutilation" sitting in that board for twenty-four hours. And I got yet another story to tell people. permalink | | More news from the Mideast to brighten your day Can the UN suck any more than it already does? They're going to start a register to take damage claims for people whose homes were destroyed by the security fence. The UN has yet to start any kind of register for damage claims from victims of terrorism or rocket attacks by palestinians.
I think what that means in American English is, "In your dreams, Kofi." Imagine there's no Israel: Josef Jaffe writes a Middle East what-if.
New face, same old terrorism: Another terrorist bomb, another dead Jew. I'm not hopeful at all about the change in leadership, because it is a change in the people that is needed. And that's enough bad news for today. I'll be back with lighter things, I hope. permalink | | 1/11/05 The rights and the wrongs of it I haven't written about this issue for weeks, because I was waiting to see how it played out. Israel deals with China on a regular basis, in spite of China's record for voting against Israel on a regular basis. When you have too many other nations willing to boycott your companies for spurious reasons, you can't refuse the largest market in the world when it opens to you. It's a difficult choice, too: I don't think Israel should sell advanced weaponry to China, but then, I don't think the United States should sell advanced weaponry to Arab nations, either. I don't get to make either call, though. Here's the summary: Israel sold China a number of Israeli-made Harpy drones in the 1990s. Recently, China sent them back to Israel and demanded an upgrade, which would have made them more sophisticated and, the U.S. Defense Dept. believes, a threat to American forces in the event of an altercation over Taiwan. There's an in-depth analysis at The Forward (bugmenot login: forward onward) which gives a very different version of the "special" relationship those neocons have with Israel. In fact, if I didn't know better, I'd say Feith and Wolfowitz were pretty pissed off with Israel right now, what with cancelling meetings, threatening the end of various relationships, things like that. But of course, that wouldn't feed into the Grand Zionist Conspiracy, so it will not get any notice by the mainstream media or the LLL. On top of this, we have the Bush Administration pushing Ariel Sharon to drop his demands that the palestinians cease attacks on Israel before they get any action from Israel on prisoner release and easing of checkpoints.
We've been here before. I cannot believe that Israel is falling for this act again, and I can't believe the Bush Administration is this stupid, but apparently, she is, and they are. In the meantime, the pals are launching rockets inside and outside Gaza, hitting Israeli towns, knocking into crowded synagogues, but heyAbbas is a moderate, he'll fix all that. Right? And the Road Map, which Abbas says he wants to implement, calls explicitly for the pals to stop terror attacksbut he knows all that. Right? And Nissam Ariv, who was a mechanic at an auto repair shop, died of wounds sustained from a Hamas kassam rocket that landed in the Erez industrial zone. Erez was created to enable palestinians to work in spite of no longer being allowed to enter Israel. The owners of Erez companies have been closing them down and bringing them into Israel, substituting foreign laborers for the cheap palestinian labor that they had been using. But the palestinians are willing to live side by side with Israel, in their own independent, peaceful state. Right? Wrong. permalink | | 1/10/05 Happy Effing Anniversary: Lair's celebrated his third anniversary yesterday. That's three years of offending people off on a daily basis. Way to go, Lair! And for a few examples of his inimitable style, go here, here, here, and here. At least one of those posts ought to offend at least one of my readers. But then again, his analysis of some situations can't be beat. Direct, brutal, no-nonsense: That's part of why people get angry with him, I supposed. That's part of why I love reading his site. That, and the cats, of course. Oh, and the Israel stuff. And the humor, even the tasteless humor. Carnival of the Cats: Almost forgot. It's over here this week. Go, look, and enjoy the kitties. I forgot. I'm sorry. I promised Asparagirl I'd link to this, and forgot. It's a study in contrast, and perhaps explains why some societies seem rooted so deeply in blood and cruelty. If I link to Ilyka, it might guilt her into posting more: In any case, she sent me to this blog, because of this proposed bill for Virginia, which got me to watching the newscasts intently last night, and which may very well get me to write to my representative to vote against this bill, regardless of the changes made to it. I don't trust it. I really don't trust this bill. Well, some stuff is local: I'm thinking of adding a Richmond blogger directory to my links page. I think I've found a few in my referrers lately, but of course, I have forgotten who they were. If you're a Richmond blogger, email me or post your URL in the comments here. Aha! Found one in my history. I was going to write on the Richmond booms, and now I don't have to. permalink | | What DOS this mean? So yes, there was another DOS attack on Hosting Matters. (That's denial of service, for those of you who may not know the acronym.) It affected my blog on and off since Friday, and since HM had to rename the servers, I couldn't upload this morning. Then I sent an email saying I couldn't upload, and Stacy Tabb, who is definitely the Supreme Web Goddess (I agree with Michele on this one), sent me an email that made me go, "Duh!" and voila, I can upload my files and update my blog. Phew. In spite of it, I have 20-20 hearing: When I first got tinnitus, I thought it was called Tintinitus. Tin-Tin is the main character in the eponymous French cartoon that I watched as a child (it was in English, though, not French). But I have tinnitus, and have had it ever since my first real effort to stop smoking. I made the mistake of substituting chewing gum, which I believe gave me that jaw misalignment whose name I have forgotten, but which is written about here. That was when I first experienced a roaring in my left ear, which I can hear when it's quiet, particularly at night. I can't hear it right now, because the exterior noises are greater than the ones in my ears. On the other hand, my father had tinnitus, so I may have inherited it, chewing gum or no chewing gum. I remember seeing Tony Randall on the Carson show once, talking about his tinnitus, and then standing ear to ear with Carson, who could hear the ringing in Tony's ears. I have no idea if mine is that loud, but I think not, and, well, there aren't too many people I feel close enough to to try that experiment. Sometimes, if it's really bothering me at night, I turn on my white noise machine, and fall asleep to the soothing sounds of rain or the ocean waves. I can't put on the forest sounds, because then Tig and Gracie start looking all over the room for the birds they hear. I have no idea why I'm writing this entry. I know I wanted to write about tinnitus before, and now I finally have. The tinnitus has spread to my right ear, although it's far quieter in that one, and generally overwhelmed by the left. And in spite of all this, I have phenomenal hearing. I am constantly overhearing whispered conversations that people think I can't hear. It makes me wonder what my hearing would be like without the tinnitus. Maybe it would be like the Six Million Dollar Woman. (Cue funky noise that indicates I'm using a bionic power.) P-p-p-p-pressure: Oh. My. God. I haven't had sinus pressure like this in ages. Someone please make the tiny men with pickaxes stop tearing apart my sinuses. The medication is only dulling it. Advil to the rescue! (I hope.) So, have you recovered yet? It's been five days since seeing Evangeline Lilly in a thong, and I'm hoping the men of America can actually speak full sentences by now. But I'm worried about Jim. He hasn't mentioned it on his blog. Do you think he's suffering from Post-Thong Stress Syndrome? (And boy, was that plot stupid or what? Gee, let's set up a bank robbery to recover a toy plane. I think not.) Hey. This show is pretty good. I watched 24 last night. I watched it the first season and hated the excessive violence, so I stopped watching after a few episodes. They seem to have cut back significantly, at least on showing the violence, and I found last night's episodes to be riveting. So now I have a few shows to watch this season, which is good, because nearly all of my favorite shows turned to suckitude (Third Watch, West Wing, ER) or were cancelled (Angel). So let's see, there's Lost, 24, Desperate Housewives, Scrubs, and Gilmore Girls. That's a far cry from my old TV-watching habits. I've cut down considerably, partly because there's so little that's good out there. Oh, and Monk, when I remember it's on. That's always good. permalink | | Jews die, UN calls for restraint: Once again, the UN tells Israel to hamstring itself and stop acting out over a measly few dead soldiers. Funny, they never call for restraint when the pals blow up innocent Israelis. More ammo for the one-state solution, you schmucks: Oh, this one 's a beaut. A demographic study by people with no experience in demography (yeah, that'll get me behind your figures, no problem) claims that the "demographic bomb" is not a threat. Much.
The authors apparently are trying to use these figures to prevent the withdrawal from Gaza. Hello, morons, the pals and their allies are going to use these figures to push for the one-state solution. Nice work, guys. Iran's undeclared war with Israel: Hezbollah is responsible for 20% of the attacks in the West Bank and Gaza in 2004. Let us review:
Syria and Iran conspire to destroy Israel, and the world sits by and says, "Say, did you hear the one about Jenin?" Time for another essay about anti-Semitism, I think. permalink | | 1/9/05 I like the cut of this JIB: Dave of Israellycool has a new set of blog awards. Or did I mention that already? They're the Jewish and Israeli blog awards, and yours truly has been nominated. And that Patterico guy can't beat me this time, because he's not Jewish. He can't qualify for best overall blog. Ha! Ha, I say! Oh, that's a surprise: Mahmoud Abbastard (credit to Mark for the new nom de guerre) has won the sham election, so now we can hear that he's the "democratically elected leader" when he cancels elections a few years from now. And of course, the pals celebrated in their usual way: By killing Jews.
No, I think it's time to buzz Baby Assad's palace again, though. And as if that weren't enough, Tel Aviv is on high alert for a possible terrorist attack. (Update: It was lowered, but not removed.)
Oh, that palestinian state is going to be a model of democracy. It may even resemble the early American west, minus the sheriffs. No, I did not call him up to ask what he was wearing today: And no, I did not name my post after having read the title to Mark's post. Serendipity strikes again: After not having used the word "miscellany" in months, I thought I'd use it today. (I have no idea why you can suddenly use Haloscan, either. Maybe atmospheric conditions changed.) permalink | | Last week's blogs are archived. Looking for the Buffy Blogburst Index? Here's Israel vs. the world. Here's the Blogathon. The Superhero Dating Ratings are here. If you're looking for something funny, try the Hulk's solution to the Middle East conflict, or Yasser Arafat Secret Phone Transcripts. Iseema bin Laden's diary is also a good bet if you've never been here before.
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