Shoes fly, don’t bother me

You know, the throwing of shoes at people you don’t like or agree with has become epidemic, and yet, it has managed to remain the most utterly stupid means of protest since the pie-in-the-face died out (mostly).

Israelis, of course, suffer from the most amounts of shoes thrown. I read of one protest in London (I think) where hundreds of shoes were left at the end of the anti-Israel march. And all I could think of was, “Ooh, good idea! I have some old sneakers I want to get rid of, and it’s a shame to throw them away.”

Are you all familiar with the term “poseur”? It is one of the terms I use only when I am really, really mocking the person(s) being called poseurs. It is probably at least number three in my list of insults, possibly number two. And I have to say, with the exception of the Iraqi who threw a shoe at President Bush, every other person who has done so since then is a poseur.

I understand perfectly well that the foot is an instrument of great insult in some Middle Eastern countries. Stamping on a picture or flag is considered hugely insulting. Throwing shoes, ditto. But I have to tell you, if you’re going to stomp on the American flag, I’m going to shrug my shoulders and think you’re an idiot. It’s really not much of an insult here. Big whoop. You stepped on my flag. Am I supposed to be upset because you’re insulting me? I’ll pencil that in, right after “Get mad at being called a great big stupid-head.”

When Western protesters join in the shoe-throwing, it simply makes me think, “Poseurs.” They can’t figure out a decent statement on their own, so they grab onto a custom that is utterly meaningless in the West. Really, think about it. When was the last time anyone threw a shoe at you outside of a domestic squabble? I’ve thrown my shoes at my cats for years, as a way of making them shut up when they’re yowling for me to get up and play with them at four in the morning. Who knew that I was actually insulting them, and that’s why they stopped yowling?

So when an upper middle class Brit, fresh out of the latest Noam Chomsky roundtable at Uni, runs out to an anti-Israel protest wearing his kaffiyeh or balaclava or black hoodie, carrying a Palestinian flag or a Hamas flag or a sign that says “We are all Hamas,” and that child throws a shoe at the Israeli flag—well, all I can think of is, “Huh. He’s making a statement that means something in Iraq, but is utterly meaningless in London.”

He is doing it to be cool. Because it’s cool to throw shoes now. Not meaningful. Cool.

Poseur.

There is no other word for a shoe-thrower these days. The act was done once with meaning, by an Iraqi reporter, who frankly may very well have been a poseur, what with knowing full well that he could throw a shoe at the leader of the free world and not be thrown into a wood chipper for it (as he could have been under the former dictator of Iraq, Saddam Hussein).

Can we please have an end to the shoe-throwing? Because, really: It’s stupid.

Poseurs.