Only in the Middle East can you read these incredibly insane theories that will be taken as absolute truth by the idiots who pass along these stories.
Man, we Jews are so sneaky, we’re setting up Palestinians to chew gum that’s laced with a drug to make them horny. That’s right. Just ask Hamas.
Is Israel targeting the Palestinian population in Gaza by distributing libido-increasing chewing gum in the Strip? A Hamas police spokesman in the Gaza Strip Islam Shahwan claimed Monday that Israeli intelligence operatives are attempting to “destroy” the young generation by distributing such materials in the coastal enclave.
Shahwan said that the police got their hands on gum that increases sexual desire that, according to him, reaches merchants in the Strip by way of the border crossings. According to him, a Palestinian drug dealer admitted that he sold products that increase sex drive. The dealer said that he received the materials from Israeli sources by way of the Karni crossing.
So basically, Hamas catches a drug dealer, beats him up a little, asks him where he’s getting his stuff, and the dealer says, “The Mossad! The Mossad are forcing me to poison our youth!” Because, of course, there’s nothing natural about teenagers wanting to have sex.
The affair was exposed when a Palestinian filed a complaint that his daughter chewed the aforementioned gum and experienced the dubious side effects.
Shahwan even claimed that Israeli intelligence operatives encourage dealers in Gaza to distribute the gum for free.
“The Israelis seek to destroy the Palestinians’ social infrastructure with these products and to hurt the young generation by distributing drugs and sex stimulants,” said Shahwan.
Those wily Jews! Spiking Palestinian chewing gum so that they’d want to do un-Islamic things like desire the opposite sex! And yet, even while insisting that the Israelis are doing this, the Hamas rep is pointing his finger in the actual direction of the drug problem:
Shahwan added that the police have recently seized large amounts of drugs and alcohol attached to the underside of automobiles passing through Erez crossing.
And every time these people get caught, whom do they blame? Of course. The Joooooooos.
The automobile owners admitted receiving help for smuggling the materials from Israeli intelligence operatives.
Man. We are so smart, we Jews. I don’t understand why, since we’re so smart, and control so many aspects of modern society, that we can’t just get rid of the irritants of Hamas, Hezbullah, and the Palestinian rejectionists. Surely there must be some kind of death ray we can develop that will focus on those who truly believe in peaceful coexistence, and those who do not.
Oh, give ’em time. They’ll blame us for that, too.
No matter what wacky theories are out there, these stooges manage to come up with even wilder ones. But think about it: Compared to the millennium-old blood libel, this business about the Choon-Gum is almost reasonable.
Say – what’ll they think of next?
Gives new meaning to the phrase “double your pleasure,” doesn’t it?
I hate to refer to chewing gum as recycled, but this has been charged before. Alas it’s a part of a pattern.
So how many mullahs confiscated the “augmented” chewing gum and took it out on a test drive.
For strictly scientific purposes doncha know.
God forbid some one get a 455 big block under the hood after having a vega 90 hp OEM