Observations

I realized a long, long time ago that I am a terrible housekeeper. It’s mostly because I really hate cleaning house. When I left my apartment last year, I decided to hire a cleaning staff so that I wouldn’t have to spend half a day or more scrubbing floors and toilets. I cleaned the fridge and the oven, and they did the rest so well that I got every penny of my deposit back. So I hired the service to clean my apartment once a month, and it’s working out just fine. Every four weeks or so, a horde of Latina women comes in, scares my cats, cleans my house, and leaves things in much better shape than they were before they showed up. And these are the things that I have noticed or learned in the last ten months:

• Only one out of every four Latina women speaks English.
• I have given up trying to explain the rules of kashrut as they affect soap pads; now, I hide one of my soap pads so I don’t mix up the meat and dairy. I suppose someday I may actually buy different-colored ones, but that would require actually thinking about it.
• My bed-making skills are apparently not up to Horde of Latina Women standards. Last month, they re-made my bed. This month, I didn’t really try very hard. I just pulled the covers up, knowing no matter what I did, they were going to redo it anyway.
• Sometimes, you just have to let them dust your desk or they’re going to burst. I kept saying no, and when I got up to go get a drink, she considered that her opportunity to descend on my computer desk and dust it.
• You know that liberal guilt thing that I grew up with? Yeah, it’s gone now. I’m perfectly content to let a cleaning service staffed almost exclusively by Latina and African-American women clean my condo. They are performing a service; I am paying them for that service. And I’m a damned good tipper, too. The American free market at work. In fact, when I can afford it, they’ll be coming every two weeks. No, three. I don’t think I need them every two weeks.
• Tonight, I’m going to start a new ritual. It’s going to be called the “Someone else cleaned my bathtub bath,” and I intend to relax in the freshly-cleaned tub (that I didn’t have to clean) tonight. I wanted to do it after my workout, but I decided to flee the noise this morning by going to the gym while they were cleaning my house.
• It is almost impossible to lose Tigger. When the Latina Horde descends, he hides under the bureau. But you can always see his tail sticking out. Miraya thought this was very amusing.

I always said I would do this when I could afford it. It’s a wonderful thing.