I’d outlaw the World Cup soccer tournament. Just to piss off all those soccer fans out there.
No, just kidding.
I’d ignore it, just as I do now.
The Catmage Chronicles
Andy thought he was going crazy when a talking cat showed up at his front door. He couldn’t have been more wrong.Goldeneyes is a Catmage – a cat with human intelligence and magical abilities. Andy is an eighth grader who is smart, impulsive, and trying to avoid the school bully at all costs. A prophecy threw them together. There’s just one problem: Goldeneyes can’t stand humans.The Catmage world is heading toward war. Goldeneyes and Andy must try to stop the enemy from getting stronger. And they must save a powerful Catmage who’s been kidnapped. For Goldeneyes, it’s personal. That Catmage is her grandmother.Andy and Goldeneyes must try to put aside their differences. If they can’t, the enemy will soon be too powerful to defeat…
Sweden 0, Trinidad and Tobasco (or was that Toboggan?) 0. And the crowd goes…comatose.
Rather watch paint dry than watch soccer.
If I were dictator:
Nerds would get scholarships and jocks would have to wait tables to get through school…
Hey Doc,
If you’re going to steal my shtick, you’re going to have to get your own blog.
Heading the ball for years causes Parkinson-like brain damage. Look at Pele in his later years. Look at a few other soccer stars once they reach their sixties. And people won’t let their kids play baseball?
chsw
Soccer is a game for poor people who cannot afford real games.
No problem, Meryl; I would never want to touch your shtick…
At least there was a little good news from the World Cup host country (and this snippet is from Reuters no less):
Bavaria’s Interior Minister Guenther Beckstein told the protesters waving Israeli flags and banners reading “Viva Israel — long live freedom” that Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was not welcome in Germany, the World Cup host country.
“A criminal like Ahmadinejad is not welcome in Germany,” the minister told the rally in a central square of the southern host city. “Only his diplomatic passport would prevent his arrest.”
As for the soccer-part, who cares? A couple weeks ago, I had a conversation with an Argentine-Israeli friend who could barely contain his disappointment (and incredulity) that Americans didn’t care about the World Cup. I told him that lots of American kids have been playing soccer at least since the ’60s (when I started playing it at recess), but for some reason, it just never became a national obsession, like baseball or football. Unsurprisingly, that makes us a snake-pit of racism in the eyes of much of the world.
I tend to see sports as akin to any other national custom or trait or what have you. Americans and Canadians love ice hockey, but it doesn’t do so well amongst the Japanese. Are the Japanese a bunch of xenophobic, slap-shot-averse reactionaries? Australians love their Vegemite, but the rest of the world is by and large resistant to its charms. Should we all feel ashamed of our self-centered, anti-Vegemite intolerance?
Hey, world. Have a nice game. If you need to contact me on Father’s Day, I’ll be at Shea Stadium with my daughter, watching the Mets and the Orioles playing that really boring game that most of you don’t like.
chsw: Baseball is much like what the Commonwealth girls play: rounders. Only with gayer outfits. There’s of course American football – rugby with sissified rules and even more sissified uniforms. Basketball is alright in my books, though :-P